I joined a bible study!

This week I've gotten a bit beyond my level of tolerant anxiety, so I joined a Bible study and I'm going to work on letting God take care of my weaknesses. I had a rough drive back to PA after break and I was highly caffeinated which made the drive nerve wracking so I prayed to God and said: "God, please don't let me die now, I'm too young. I promise I'll put you first in my life, I want you to be my center of attention." So here I am. My anxiety returned and I had to transfer the burden to Jesus to move forward. The biggest challenge for me being a high strung individual is being "ok" with myself when tension and stress get in the way of enjoying life and being productive. At church this weekend, at bible study, and in my daily bread reading with Chris this weekend, the message was constant. After taking the RISC assessment for Bible study I've learned we're all unique, AND we all reflect God. There's nothing wrong with us. God glorifies in our beings. And when we see that we all mirror Jesus Christ, we better understand that we together, a multitude of instruments can truly make a masterpiece. We just have to work together. Here's a few ideas from this weekend I'd like to share:

I am one of God's living stones, being built up in Christ as a spiritual house (I Peter 2:5)
I am an alien and stranger to this world in which I temporarily live (I Peter 2:11)
I am chosen and appointed by Christ to bear His fruit (John 15:16)
I am a joint heir with Christ, sharing His inheritance with him (Romans 8:17)
I am God's workmanship- His handiwork- born anew in Christ to do His work (Ephesians 2:10)


Psalm 139:13-16
 ¹³ For you created my inmost being; 
   you knit me together in my mother’s womb. 
¹⁴ I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; 
   your works are wonderful, 
   I know that full well. 
¹⁵ My frame was not hidden from you 
   when I was made in the secret place, 
   when I was woven together in the depths of the earth. 
¹⁶ Your eyes saw my unformed body; 
   all the days ordained for me were written in your book 
   before one of them came to be.

Have we become arrogant?

Its funny, thinking about how people learn, many of us procrastinate. Others are diligent and get the job done in a timely manner, while others seemingly cheat at life. But one thing is certain, we often learn through punishment. The question is, when we become adults and life isn't going our way (or maybe it is) do we become hard to learning and prefer to settle with comfort and ignore what we are being taught? Are we overlooking life lessons?
I stayed up last night doing homework, saw the clock this morning, and rolled over convinced I couldn't get ready for church that quickly. I am stubborn, and have to learn the lesson over and over again... what am I without God? I'm powerless, I'm ugly, and I have no motivation. If you are Godless, is this how you feel?

Its been a while since I've opened up the Bible on my own to learn something new. To attempt to finish the New Testament. This is what I have learned... Paul, God's most devout athiest up until God showed himself to Paul, is warning the Corinthians that of all the guardians who surround us in Christ, not all of them are worthy of imitation. Some non-Christians are turned away for this very reason from God. We can't as a body in Christ let ourselves become arrogant. Paul talked of coming to visit in saying:

1 Corinthians 4:19-21

"But I will come to you very soon, if the Lord is willing, and then I will find out not only how these arrogant people are talking, but what power they have. For the kingdom of God is not a matter of talk but of power. What do you prefer? Shall I come to you with a whip, or in love with a gentle spirit?"

I look like I am doing something important... writing this blog... but this is my way of analyzing my heart, and it is not "good." For the sake of my own desires to succeed, I have left God in the dust when he's the only one that can get me through it. I'm curious... where are you with or without God? And how much pain and struggle do you fight to grasp power? I'm also asking myself this question... For me, I am avoiding servitude. The longer I wait to join back with my loving Christ, the more I feel alone. Why do I feel alone? Because I'm separating myself from God. 

What do you hold on to?

After a moment of self reflection and a moment of reflecting on other's lives, I ask what do you hold on to?
Some very simple concepts are trickery to the brain. We don't cling to what is logical, we cling to something that is just there. For example...
We cling as easily to failure as we do to insecurities, falsehoods, etc. Anything that is most irrational we find comfort in blaming.
Yet I wonder... how many people look in the mirror and see the person God sees in each one of us? How many of us settle instead because we find the flaws in ourselves unworthy of anything more?
And how many of us can see genuine love and aren't blinded by the call of the world?

I can't say I think about this frequently, because God has opened my heart to be a little less self conscious, a little more accepting, and much more understanding in the last few years. I sometimes feel guilt for not feeling like I'm meeting expectations made by God and made by myself. When will we show face for Christ Jesus and except the beauty he has bestowed upon us to be a reflection of His greatest glory? Jesus doesn't expect perfection. He wants us to accept his compassion, love, and desire to bring happiness and hope to the world.

A few verses I would like to remember:

How long will you men turn my glory into shame? How long will you love delusions and seek false gods ?

Psalm 4:2

Even to your old age and gray hairs I am he, I am he who will sustain you. I have made you and I will carry you; I will sustain you and I will rescue you.
Isaiah 46:4 TNIV

Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud.
1 Corinthians 13:3-5

Storms of life

This blog entry is dedicated to a specific friend who asked me to write an entry for her. Not only might she experience some weather from Hurricane Irene, but she also is seeking a new perspective.

how shall we escape if we ignore so great a salvation? This salvation, which was first announced by the Lord, was confirmed to us by those who heard him. Hebrews 2:3

When I'm asked to write this blog entry, I immediately thought of Jonah. Jonah, in the old testament, was swallowed by a whale after being thrown overboard. Ultimately, Jonah had been given the task to spread the word of God to a certain group of people, but because he did not want to do the task, he went off in the opposite direction and boarded a ship. When a destructive storm threatened to take their boat, those on the ship cast lots- similar to flipping a coin- to see who brought God's wrath on their ship. When the lot landed on Jonah, he was thrown off the ship and swallowed by a whale. As you see in the following passage, Jonah knew what he had to do to save the men and save himself.

 Jonah 1:12-16

“Pick me up and throw me into the sea,” he replied, “and it will become calm. I know that it is my fault that this great storm has come upon you.”

Instead, the men did their best to row back to land. But they could not, for the sea grew even wilder than before. Then they cried out to the LORD, “Please, LORD, do not let us die for taking this man’s life. Do not hold us accountable for killing an innocent man, for you, LORD, have done as you pleased.” Then they took Jonah and threw him overboard, and the raging sea grew calm. At this the men greatly feared the LORD, and they offered a sacrifice to the LORD and made vows to him.

He remained in the belly of the whale for 3 days and nights, until he prayed to God and In my life, when I hit a rocky path I look at my troubling circumstances two ways: If I'm not in God's will and I allow him, he will correct my path, or if I don't allow him, I will suffer much turmoil until I am willing to open my ears. Believe it or not, I am often challenged with this dilemma, and this summer has lead me to take the easy way... through staying in God's will.
Jonah 2:1-10
From inside the fish Jonah prayed to the LORD his God. ² He said:

   “In my distress I called to the LORD,
   and he answered me.
From deep in the realm of the dead I called for help,
   and you listened to my cry. 

You hurled me into the depths,
   into the very heart of the seas,
   and the currents swirled about me;
all your waves and breakers
   swept over me.
I said, ‘I have been banished
   from your sight;
yet I will look again
   toward your holy temple.’
The engulfing waters threatened me,
   the deep surrounded me;
   seaweed was wrapped around my head. 

To the roots of the mountains I sank down;
   the earth beneath barred me in forever.
But you, LORD my God,
   brought my life up from the pit.

“When my life was ebbing away,
   I remembered you, LORD,
and my prayer rose to you,
   to your holy temple.

“Those who cling to worthless idols
   turn away from God’s love for them. 

But I, with shouts of grateful praise,
   will sacrifice to you.
What I have vowed I will make good.
   I will say, ‘Salvation comes from the LORD.’”

 And the LORD commanded the fish, and it vomited Jonah onto dry land. 

So what is my advice? When your life is full of turmoil, turn to the Lord, and our savior Jesus Christ. Through his death and resurrection he gave us eternal life... the ability to be freed from sin and given the direction by the holy spirit that lives within those who believe. 

Matthew 12:38-40

Then some of the Pharisees and teachers of the law said to him, “Teacher, we want to see a sign from you.”

 He answered, “A wicked and adulterous generation asks for a sign! But none will be given it except the sign of the prophet Jonah. For as Jonah was three days and three nights in the belly of a huge fish, so the Son of Man [Jesus] will be three days and three nights in the heart of the earth.

Secondly, think about what you say and don't judge the ill at heart. Treat your neighbor as yourself. Love your enemy. If you can follow these things, turmoil will pass you by because nothing is too great for our God to handle. Don't tell God how big your storm is, rather, tell the storm how big your God is.

 Matthew 12:33-37

 “Make a tree good and its fruit will be good, or make a tree bad and its fruit will be bad, for a tree is recognized by its fruit. You brood of vipers, how can you who are evil say anything good? For the mouth speaks what the heart is full of. A good man brings good things out of the good stored up in him, and an evil man brings evil things out of the evil stored up in him. But I tell you that everyone will have to give account on the day of judgment for every empty word they have spoken. For by your words you will be acquitted, and by your words you will be condemned.”

Let's be real

So, I've noticed some things about myself. At times I am feisty, brainless, self-revolving, and fast to complain. If you or I were to ignore our most passionate outbursts and FAIL to claim them as a part of us, we would both be lying and not be human. So, after a very long day of anxious thoughts and lots of sleeping, I would like to ask this... what is it that makes the negativity become what we are? Why do we complain, struggle, fight, when we have so much to be thankful for?

A life centered around God is productive and full of joy. I know this because I've been there. Our biggest problem is keeping God at the center of our lives. Ironically enough, I went to biblegateway.com and the verse of the day is this:

“If we live, we live to the Lord; and if we die, we die to the Lord. So, whether we live or die, we belong to the Lord.” Romans 14:8

The problem is, we feel abandoned, unclaimed, alone. But God will have us. We don't have to feel insignificant, even when we feel this way about ourselves.
Again, randomly I chose a verse in Proverbs; 15:21. 
Folly brings joy to those who have no sense,
   but those who have understanding keep a straight course. 
Why do we choose the easy path? Why do we get lazy when we get stressed? What is your defense mechanism and how can God heal you to be the best that you can be?  These are the words I need to hear. Those who have understanding keep a straight course.

Does God Speak? God in my life.

It's an interesting question being asked how God speaks to me... but, everyone has a different viewpoint. Some people are more conscientious of themselves than others in terms of obedience, and I believe our receptiveness to God's challenges guide what we will "hear" as well as "receive".

If we know the Bible and are conscientious of our actions, our tendencies to know our wrongs are much greater. If I try to "control" my life, I have a sense of anxiety from knowing my control is not part of God's plan. I know, for example, that totaling my car was "likely inevitable" based on my attitude that "I" can play catch up and the lesson isn't merely "Don't go fast, and watch out for curves and slippery spots," but rather, what choices will I make now when I have less? What will I change in my life to keep me from rushing at the last minute? What will I do now with an attitude pleasing to God to handle my circumstances? When we are willing to listen, we handle problems with a positive attitude. We are receptive and do not shut God out. When I shut God out I become cold to others and selfish. When I have a positive attitude and look to the Bible for wisdom and pray, I am open to correction and more selfless in my motivations and actions.

A second lesson I encountered from totaling my car was that maybe God isn't only speaking to me through the accident. Maybe, God was trying to show my parents that had I gone on the mission trip I wanted to go on, I would have had the entire expense paid for plus some with the money they used to buy me a new car. When we are in God's will he will take care of us. Some of God's lessons aren't cheap... but sometimes its the only way he can get our attention. With money.

Over the course of my time here in PA, I feel like I've learned a lot about living as a mature and humble servant to Christ. Sometimes exposure to the real world makes us more aware of how much we really need God. I like to think about it this way... if your actions change depending on who you are with- church, family or friends, how are you being true to yourself? How are you representing Christ as a living example today? What is the root of your shame and has correction or acceptance made your condition "ok?" Those living without shame are either ignoring God's calling to become Christlike, or have humbled themselves before God and know that being humbled by the spirit has taken away their shame. The pursuit of Christ's rather than man's ultimate desire for us will pave the path in life and make our steps light footed. By this I mean easier to handle. Not all that witness the work of God in us will be accepting, but when love for one another rather than selfish pursuits is the focus, life works out as God intends.

So live your life by "what would Jesus do?" When we are too conscientious of our actions, we dwell on the thought of making a mistake. Obsession is also a sin and yields little. When we live for Jesus, we know that trouble will come our way because we believe that Satan will pursue the humble and poor in spirit. We also know that the humble and poor in spirit will appear less afflicted because their "dependency on the world" is lesser. When Jesus becomes our daily bread rather than our actions, desires, and looks, we are less distracted by "the world."

God doesn't speak through literal words, often it is the sermon I am drawn to attend, or the praise and worship that ministers to my spiritual needs. Through being obedient to attend I learn WHY I was brought to this place of worship and what God has in store for me. Maybe I take teaching more literally than others, but I prefer being taught by Jesus, the perfect teacher, than dwelling on my own attempts that fail me and lead me to stumble.

Proverbs 3:5-6 Trust in the Lord with all thine heart and lean not unto thine own understanding. In all thy ways acknowledge Him and he shall direct thy paths.

Does God Speak?

Apparently, I have written on this exact topic before. This time however, I have been enlightened. Acts 2:17-21 reveals much about this topic often pondered. Some people experiencing near death scenarios will see Jesus, a bright light, etc., but the question here is, does man on Earth today still see angels, have dreams, etc sent from God? If not now, we are told we will before the end of the world by the prophet Joel.

¹⁷ “‘In the last days, God says,
   I will pour out my Spirit on all people.
Your sons and daughters will prophesy,
   your young men will see visions,
   your old men will dream dreams.
¹⁸ Even on my servants, both men and women,
   I will pour out my Spirit in those days,
   and they will prophesy.
¹⁹ I will show wonders in the heaven above
   and signs on the earth below,
   blood and fire and billows of smoke.
²⁰ The sun will be turned to darkness
   and the moon to blood
   before the coming of the great and glorious day of the Lord.
²¹ And everyone who calls
   on the name of the Lord will be saved.’

Acts 2 continues with this encouraging set of verses. I'd like to describe the words that follow as "soft love."

²⁵ David said about him:

   “‘I saw the Lord always before me.
   Because he is at my right hand,
   I will not be shaken.
²⁶ Therefore my heart is glad and my tongue rejoices;
   my body also will rest in hope,
²⁷ because you will not abandon me to the realm of the dead,
   you will not let your holy one see decay.
²⁸ You have made known to me the paths of life;
   you will fill me with joy in your presence.’